Exploring Kink as a Monogamous Married Couple
I have a naughty side. Not like break the law naughty, but playful naughty. Sometimes I’ll pinch Sirs bottom. Sometimes I’ll smack it. Sometimes I’m cheeky. All these things, I’ve learned can be described almost like an alternative personality. You may have heard of littles, where a person likes to be taken care of like a child. In some cases they like to be diapered and bottle fed or pretend to breast feed. Some identify as older, more like toddlers, and they may like to colour with …
I married Mr H on a beautiful sunny day in September 1999. It wasn’t the day we envisioned. My mother took over, his mother had her say too. If we could go back and do it again… we would elope. Whenever I asked Mr H his opinion he would say I don’t care, what ever you like. I thought that meant he didn’t care. It wasn’t that at all, he said, he was interested in marrying me, being married to me, the wedding was just one …
There are so many different kinks it would be foolish of me to try and list them all. But Kink still needed to be included in the A2Z. There’s also some that are more hard core than others. A bit like soft porn and hard core porn there are scales of kink. A2Z of Kink I guess our kinks lie in the soft end. Anal play, bondage, impact play, sex toys like phallic vibrators as well as wands, oral sex and wax play. We have …
Limits are something that every person entering into a D/s relationship needs to clearly establish. We all have them. There are generally accepted to be 2 types, soft limits and hard limits. I once read a submissive having said “I submit completely I have no hard limits I will do anything.” When the Dominant asked her to shave all her hair off she said “no” He of course then pointed out that this was in fact a limit, something she wouldn’t do, and we all …
Relationships require effort and I think that a D/s relationship requires more than most. I’m not trying to diminish in any way a loving, healthy vanilla relationship, not at all, but I believe we can become quite complacent in long term relationships. We can take our partners for granted. Sex can become routine, I mean if you know what works for each other that’s what you’re going to do – right? Daily living takes over from excitement and passion and falls into the pattern of …
The second word from the anachronism BDSM, Discipline is an important part of my relationship with MrH. I am expected to maintain a certain level of self discipline, in that I must follow rules I have been set but also it falls to MrH to discipline me when I fail to follow the rules. This isn’t something he initially felt comfortable with but he does it as required. Of course D could also stand for Dominant, the role MrH plays in our relationship. MrH agreed …
I’m a self professed Anal Slut. I love it. It makes me feel submissive and owned. It turns me on in a big way and it’s something Mr H has said we will explore more, but we don’t often. In fact we haven’t for a while but that means it remains a special treat. I think some of it is to do with the necessary preparation. With the risk of cross contamination, anal play takes thought, more planning. Gloves, condoms lube and wipes are needed. …
One of the first things MrH and I did when we started our D/s journey was agree some safewords. We went with the very simple traffic light system that is quite commonly used. During impact play MrH would ask me “what colour?” Green If I was comfortable and happy to continue, I would respond with “Green.” Yellow If I could continue but was getting close to my limit, or needed a little break, I would respond with “Yellow.” Red – ‘The Safeword’ This isn’t a …
This is something I battle with on a daily basis, feeling sexy. Naked I don’t often feel sexy. I see stretch marks and cellulite. I see lumps and a lack of symmetry. I see surgical scars. What makes me feel sexy? In lingerie, sometimes, it depends on where my head is at. If I’m down all I see are lumps and bumps. Other times I see a curvaceous woman that MrH loves. The angle and filters help of course. Fully clothed I often feel most …
Bondage plays a big part of our relationship. When I first asked Mr H to consider adding BDSM elements to our relationship bondage was my starting point. I asked him to try restraining and dominating me. Mr H didn’t think I’d like being restrained and told what to do but he was willing to give it a go! Verbal Bondage Our first dabble was verbal control. He positioned me on the bed and told me “don’t move”. These simple words sent a tingle through me …