4 Thought or Fiction

F4TF: I’m not crazy

There’s a song I found years ago, and loved instantly, on a list songs that Stephanie Meyers says she listened to while writing the Twilight Saga.  The song, by Matchbox 20 Unwell resonated with me then and still does to this day although MrH thinks it’s a strange song.

There’s link to the video on YouTube at the bottom of the post.

 ”I’m not crazy I’m just a little unwell “

Having lived through my breakdown it seemed to me that this song understood what I felt because the lyrics captured the moods perfectly.  I may look crazy sometimes- sitting all day in my pyjamas, not showering or bathing, having no energy or motivation, or I may be able to put on a happy face.  If I wore my mask well you wouldn’t have known there was anything wrong.

This song and it’s lyrics just spoke to me.  There must be other people who feel this way if someone has written a song about it.

Anything but ordinary

I think I’m probably always going to battle depression.  It’s going to be at the back of my mind, like a troll under a bridge.  It’s always waiting for me to come close enough to grab.  Fortunately the coping mechanisms I now have in place keep that troll captive, caged, unable to grab me and drag me into the darkness.

I know that I am a little peculiar too though.  Sometimes I burst into song and I have been known to dance at work.  I’ll sing sentences as if I’m in a musical and make people laugh  with silly behaviour.

I guess what I’m trying to say is I may be crazy at times, but at least I’m not ordinary 😊

Sweetgirl x

Sweet Autumn Rose  

 

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5 Comments

  1. Bloody right Sweet! that last line is brilliant! – s I may be crazy at times, but at least I’m not ordinary
    u go girl – we are what we are, we do what we do – i cant listen to the song at the mo but will when alone x

  2. David says:

    I think a lot of us have the black dog nipping at our heels everyday, some are better at hiding it than others. Nothing wrong with liking songs that others find peculiar…….I have been told I have ‘song tourettes’ as will blast out one line and then shut up! Hahahaha.

    1. Lol, song Tourettes – love it

  3. Yep, one of those songs that grabbed me too. If you have the experience, it makes sense.

  4. A perfect song choice for this week’s topic and I love the sentiments you share in this post. When I was little I couldn’t imagine anything worse than being ordinary, it honestly filled me with fear, but my brain has seen to it that ordinary is very rarely a word folks would use about me, lol. Some of those less ordinary things are fabulous, and others are quirks of my anxiety and other brain foibles. They all make me who I am though, so like you I just try to avoid the troll under the bridge for as long as possible. Fabulous post and great song share for #F4TFriday x

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