Exploring Kink as a Monogamous Married Couple
Within a D/s relationship with a power exchange like ours, control is just an illusion. We have agreed rules and boundaries; Mr H works within those boundaries. To the outside world, it looks like Mr H has all the power because he makes the decisions. And, that is where the illusion lies, because I have the power to veto anything I don’t want to do by using a safeword, or by calling the whole agreement off. It begins with a conversation. When we started our …
When we entered into a D/s relationship, MrH and I talked about our fantasies and it opened up a whole world of sexual play that had been previously unexplored. In our early years I purchased a number of traditional dress up items. A French Maids outfit and a PVC dress were worn with stockings to great effect and MrH’s delight, but having worn them once, having seen them once, MrH would always decline when I asked if he wished me to wear them again. I …
Not the food, the singer. I love a power ballad, and Meatloaf is very good at them. Of course “I would do anything for Love- but I won’t do that” is the song most people think of when you say Meatloaf, in fact I read somewhere (probably twitter) that Meatloaf is the perfect safeword – cos it means you will do anything but not that.. but I digress. I do love that song but I have always preferred “I’d lie for you (and that’s the …
Training is something that is definitely prevalent in D/s fiction and I admit to enjoying the Brie series of books by Red Phoenix which chronicles Brie’s journey through a submissive training school. I have no problem with training in fiction, however, I do have some issues with the concept of training in real life. Why would one person wish to fundamentally change another? I asked MrH to add D/s to our relationship we came to a mutual agreement about the way that would be put …
A reset is used to draw a line under a period of time and start fresh. In terms of our D/s this usually means a lapse in following the rules, and / or a drop in mind sets. With the recent health challenges we were in need of a reset and Mr H used our go to method, a spanking, to achieve it. Resets. I had shifted myself to stretch my back a little and I was on my hands and elbows and my behind …
My dear friend and fellow submissive wife Submissy wrote an excellent post about what constitutes a scene and where the terminology comes from, and so I don’t want to repeat the same information, she expresses this so well I would prefer to direct you to her post. Instead I am going to focus on my experiences of scenes with Mr H. Our time constraints mean our scenes do not last for hours at a time, in fact I’ve never timed them so I couldn’t say …
I admit I love anal sex. It puts me into a mental place that I love but for various reasons it isn’t something we do often. Probably because of that it remains something that is very effective in putting me into a submissive space. Overpower Me There is something quite primal and Dominant about anal sex. The possibility for pain, the resistance of the body against intrusion, the need to actively surrender to his possession is something which I find highly erotic, and that’s before …
Consent in D/s relationships is essential. When a couple first begins this type of relationship it begins with communication. Communicating their interests and desires, their likes and dislikes, what they are willing to try and what they are not; consent is formed through these discussions. When Mr H and I began this journey I asked him to consider ‘doing that’ to me. The ‘that’ I referred to was a scene from Fifty Shades of Gray, in all honesty I forget which one, but the point …
The latest prompt from the Tell Me About meme by The Safewords Club, is Rituals. I’ve written about this subject a few times and you can read them via the links at the bottom of the post. Fair warning there may be some repetition but I will do my best not to do it too much! So, without further blathering, let’s get to it, and talk about Rituals! The Oxford English Dictionary says that this word originates in the 16th century (at least as an …
Since we began our D/s journey Mr H and I have made some amazing friends. We have met some in real life, some we will likely never meet due to the logistics (they live abroad), and some, who we hope to meet at next years Eroticon. I think, like most we initially chatted to people online. Mr H chose communities for us to join, Fetlife was the first he asked me about. Let me explain. I suggested adding BDSM to our relationship and then I …