I have debated writing this post for a while, not only because it can be a sensitive topic and I wasn’t sure if Mr H would be ok with me writing about it, but also because it feels insensitive. I have mentioned a few times that Mr H has struggled to take full advantage of our alone time. What I have avoided mentioning, is that the pressure he feels to ‘perform’ has left him either unable to get or struggling maintain an erection. This can become almost a self fulfilling prophesy as the worry that you might not get an erection then leads to you not getting one, and around it goes. We have a regular chat each week and Mr H told me that he had done an online consultation and was considering ordering some Viagra to try.
Stunned.
I tried not to act dumbfounded. I just hadn’t considered this something he would do. Of course my brain had immediately gone down the “you don’t find me sexually attractive” route blaming my weight gain on the lack of sexual desire. I have many times said that I can understand why he wouldn’t want to have sex with me when I look as I do, and no matter how much reassurance he gave me I stubbornly held onto that belief.
My first thought was, had I put him under so much pressure that he felt he had to try it? My second was – how hard would he get, and for how long?
Am I being Selfish?
The second thought was rather fleeting I am glad to say, because at the end of the day, this wasn’t about me. We talked for some time about it and eventually he ordered some. This was just before the new year. For the next few days I did a lot of thinking. Was this really necessary? Our recent play time had been successful. During the spanking he had been very hard and yet there were other times when he was only semi erect and while he was able to eventually climax it took quite some effort, which I assume is because he wasn’t as hard as he would have been in the past.
The little Blue pills Arrived.
We talked some more after the Viagra arrived. Mr H explained that he saw them as an aid, something to help him overcome his anxiety when we go to a hotel. He can take a pill and not have to worry that he won’t get an erection during play. Hopefully this will mean he can enjoy our time away much more with one less thing to worry about, and perhaps he will find that after some successful play dates he wont need them.
I asked that he consider trying them out at home first so we know what to expect when we go away.
Putting Viagra to the test.
Our son J announced he was going to go out with friends for a few hours and as soon as he left Mr H took the Viagra tablet. It takes 30 minutes to start to work and so he went for a shower to pass some time. I decided to put on some matching underwear and suspenders and stockings to set the mood. This is not easy for me. When Mr H returned to the bedroom he said how nice I looked and that I should remove the panties.
Here I had made a fundamental and rookie mistake. I had put them on how you see them in magazines, with the suspenders over the panties. In reality you wear them under the panties or you can’t go to the loo easily, or get your panties off quickly. In the end Mr H helped me and also instructed that I should remove the bra, leaving me in suspenders and stockings only.
I worried at this point that the mood had been spoiled but Mr H got 2 vibrators and the lube out. He applied a liberal amount to my pussy and kissed me. The play was unhurried and not overly kinky. I was told to put my hands above my head, and again I managed to mumble some direction on how to move the vibrator for best effect. When Mr H moved to allow me to have his cock in my mouth I found he was very, very hard. He thrust his cock into my mouth and it filled me. I felt the tip in my throat blocking my air and it felt so good.
He fucked my face and used the vibrator to fuck my pussy at the same time, until he climaxed. I swallowed like a good girl. After ejaculation he became soft which surprised him but the following morning he reported waking through the night with a very hard cock several times.
After Action Review.
The following day I asked Mr H how he had found it and if he thought it had been beneficial. He said he wasn’t sure if it was the Viagra or just the play as he had not got an erection when the 30 minutes elapsed and when he began play he had got a little hard then gone soft again. “I just focused on playing with you and the next thing I was hard again,” he said. I said that he had felt very hard when he was in my mouth, and he agreed that this was when he too noticed that he had got really hard.
In all I think it was a successful test, and if it enables Mr H to work through worrying about hurting me and worrying he isn’t performing then I am all for it. We will be away soon and I hope very much that the Viagra will mean he can relax and enjoy himself.
Sweetgirl x
This prompt is linked to Wicked Wednesday #502 “Lost and Found”, click HERE to visit the link page and read more posts inspired by or linked to the prompt.
I have also linked this to a new meme (well new to me) Tell Me About: Sexual Health. It is an open sharing resource where you can share posts about sexual health issues. The aim on the Tell Me About projects are to encourage the sharing of knowledge and experiences of a variety of topics. Click HERE to visit the page and find more Sexual Health articles.
The only thing I would say is the headache. It may have been a coincidence but I had a stonking headache.
Oh I forgot about that. Xx
Cluster headaches are quite common as the blood vessels expand so much.
They should be fleeting though and only last a few hours.
They should also become less intense as your body gets used to the new aide.
That’s what we thought
Mr E has used Viagra when we hired dungeons and also had headaches after. Apparently quite common.
lilly
Lilly recently posted…Hello 2022
Yes it is in the side effects …. but some of them (if you read them) are quite scary lol Just need to make sure we take some headache tablets with us .
I know it’s a sensitive subject but cudos to you both for trying and discussing (especially with others).
I really like how you discuss that Mr. H wasn’t hard simply because he took the pill and still had to have mental stimulation and enjoy his submissive a bit before it worked. People always think the mind is just a womans sexual organ, but it’s really a human sexual organ and plays a huge role no matter gender 🙂
MrsK recently posted…Submission 365: Days 9-11
Thank you, I always try and be as real and honest as I can be, in the hopes it encourages others to do the same.
Oh Sweet (and MrH) I think it is SO important to write about this! Thank you for sharing your experiences with this! Sorry about the headache, MrH but so good on the hardness 😉
~ Marie xox
Marie Rebelle recently posted…Lost and found many times
it was definitely good…
[…] Sweet Girl for the post Trying Viagra for the First Time […]
Due to back injury my Master has to use the pills every once and a while. To save money, his PCP prescribed a ‘heart medication’ that gives the same effect and is less expensive. He has the anxiety over not hurting me too. He has to find a good balance and the pill helps him. He doesn’t always need the pill!
I think it’s about knowing you have a back up plan just in case don’t you?
I always think if you have something you might not need it, but its better to have it in the drawer than need it and not have it.
I know that’s how Mr H is seeing it…
I’m very grateful for you commenting too, it is reassuring to know that there are other people who have used these medicines (or something similar) as I think it is not talked about as openly as it could be.
Mr Jones has used viagra in the past when we have been at swingers clubs and parties. He finds it difficult to maintain an erection when there is so much background stuff going on. He did have an issue with a blood vessel in his eye which he believes could have been a result of the drug and has not used it for quite some time.
Gemma+Jones recently posted…Thirty Dirty Questions – Question 19
Did the eye issue clear up? I guess the increased blood flow could burst a weak vessel in the eye or anywhere really.
Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. This is something that isn’t talked about enough and so I appreciate you and Mr H being open about it so that others can benefit from your experience. I can totally understand the pressures on play – HL definitely finds it much harder (or not lol) when there are others in the house and lots going on so it is something we have thought about. I am really pleased that this worked so well for you although it is a pity about the headache. Hopefully that will stop happening if you use it more. Missy x
That’s one of the reasons we decided to share our experiences. Like mental health, erectile issues aren’t talked about enough, and I think people assume that once you use pills to help, you will always need to. We have only used the viagra once, and in subsequent play Mr H has found he has not needed to. I think that knowing he has something he can take “if” he needs to has helped him relax.
Apologies, I only just found your site and am enjoying the content very much.
This was a great post.
My wife and I have been married 35 years and recently I had a lot of difficulty getting it up, what’s worse, it started during a getaway we had been planning for a long time. It hit me pretty “hard” and as you say, became a self-fulfilling prophesy. Sex became something I got apprehensive about and it snowballed into a lot of frustration and self-doubt. We tried Viagra and it helped though mostly I think it helped me get past the worry about performance and we found over time we didn’t need it all the time.
My wife was great about it which helped, and she found that talking dirty and long, slow hand and blow-jobs relaxed me enough to “move forward.”
Thanks for this post.
Thank you for reading and replying. I think it is a topic that needs to be talked about more and in terms that do not perpetuate the idea that it is a failure.
I’m thrilled you and your wife sought help and that the reassurance of the tablet being there “if” needed helped lesson the anxiety and stress.
Take care
Sweetgirl
If it helps, then why not use it. Perhaps, over time, his confidence will be restored and he will be able to do without Viagra.
Our thoughts exactly.
[…] to believe it. Some of that is because of the reduction in sexual activity between us, which I have talked about before. Logically I know there are other factors for this, emotionally I can’t seem to accept it. […]