Exploring Kink as a Monogamous Married Couple
Food for Thought Friday has been hosted thus far by the wonderful Kilted Wookie, but he has decided to step down. While the meme will continue under the watchful guidance of May Moore and Floss, he has set the last topic. I don’t take part every week, just when the topic or questions evoke a response. This week is one of those weeks.. What, if any, have been your particular landmarks, either in relation to your blog or your wider life? Do you have any …
Maintaining a healthy mental state, is quite a challenge, at least it is for me. I take medication daily which works well to stabilise my mood. I’ve been medicated for depression and anxiety since 2005, essentially 18 months after my dad passed away. I had a full blown breakdown in 2005. I stopped working. I stopped functioning. I stopped doing pretty much everything. I spent 3 years getting better. I spent 3 years learning to deal with rough seas. It wasn’t all doom and gloom. In fact …
When I asked MrH to explore BDSM with me I didn’t really know where it would lead. In my mind I painted a picture of what it would be like and how it would work. The reality was quite different. 100% better than I thought possible. I have found that I need his dominance to make me feel good. I need him to be in control to feel secure. I need to feel taken care of to feel safe. I need to know I am accountable to feel …
Normally I wouldn’t use the phrase “must” or “should” in relation to BDSM. Normally I would say do what works for you. But, in this one thing I am going to. In my opinion you cannot and should not be in any form of BDSM relationship without Trust. Whether it’s Bondage, Discipline, Dominance and submission, Sadism or Masochism, every aspect requires Trust. The Basics In the beginning, I believed M rH and I Trusted each other. I opened the door to D/s and that Trust …
Spanking was one of the first things I put onto my “Hell Yes” list when we began exploring BDSM. I didn’t do a whole lot of research, naively thinking I had a good understanding of the subject! Oh how little I knew!!!! Thankfully Mr H did do research. Unbeknownst to me, a lot of research. He found websites and forums, and brought them to my attention. In his post A New Dom’s Tale he talks about the first 6 months and his experience and his …
I did it. The whole alphabet. I couldn’t have done it if I hadn’t spent the weekends preparing a number of posts in advance. It was an interesting challenge but not one I will do again. I prefer writing about things as they happen to me, as I think about them, or when something inspires me. It is my “journal” after all. Here are links to each post.
Mr H will tell you he doesn’t find being in charge that different. He says he’s always had the final say or our house would be like a zoo. And he’s right. I’m a sucker for animals. We have 2 cats. We had a beautiful loving faithful dog. He passed 4 years ago and we still miss him. But without Mr H putting his foot down we would have another dog in the house by now. Mr H has an affinity with dogs, well all animals …
This is the word I use to caution Mr H. It tells him that I am nearing the limit of my tolerance, that I need him to take things slower, pause, or check in with me. This word doesn’t stop play. This word prompts him to assess my body language, to verbally check in. I use this word when we play with the cane if the pain is getting too much, and he will rub my bottom for a few moments before checking I am happy to …
I have had many x-rays in my life time, but have only actually broken 1 bone. Rather undramatically I slipped on the stairs trying to pet my female cat and broke my first toe (the one next to the big one) and sprained my ankle. Only 2 weeks before this I had come off my motorbike at 30 mph, with only bruises… go figure! But as I say I have had many X-rays. They are a brilliant diagnostic tool and they fascinate me. I have …
I’ve always liked to know how things work. “Why?” Drove my mum mad when I was a toddler… my boys were similarly curious. Unfortunately, why? has been the root cause of much of my mental health issues. Why did my dad have to die suddenly of a heart attack, aged 51? Why did my mum let my stepfather terrorise me? Why did my first husband cheat? Why didn’t my dad pick me up from the train station when I would visit as a single mum like …