But I don’t feel right. I usually feel calm and content. But instead I feel sad, disconnected, distant. Although S1 headed off to London and we “in theory” had our old routines back things just don’t feel right. That’s not to say MrH and I haven’t played because we have. We have tested the replacement wand. And I’ve been allowed to suck MrH’s cock before bed time twice this week. He allows this for a time and then he will instruct me to stop and fuck …
One more sleep
Tomorrow we’re going to our first BDSM event. I’m getting hair and makeup done and I’ve had my nails manicured and my brows waxed and tinted today. I’m about 45% nervous 55% excited. Oh and I’m so horny again! Work has settled into place this week and I’ve been able to relax into a routine. That has lessened my daily stress and this in turn has allowed me to bring my focus back to MrH. Naturally that leads to me being wanton and horny. Yesterday …
I’m gonna show you Crazy!
It’s been one year and a bit since we became a D/s couple. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’m also more terrified. I’m so terrified that it will end. Frightened it’s been a wonderful illusion. Scared the passion will evaporate. So scared it makes me a little crazy. For years our relationship drifted along. We were happy enough, and we had good sex. Not often mind you – everyday life got in the way. We were tired. We didn’t make the effort. My self …
What a wonderful night…
I could write in detail about our most recent hotel stay. Oh yes I could tell you about that wonderful night, and day. I could tell you about the delicious food, the lovely rooms and the delightful view from the balcony. I could tell you how I was bound and pleasured. I could tell you about the seemly endless minutes of forced orgasms where time stopped and all I could do was feel, and breathe. I could tell you about Sirs hand spanking me. About …
Hotel stay – debrief
We have started making time to discuss play, not a massive deal no one has to write a report or complete a ‘feedback sheet’ but a snuggle with questions and answers. So, Saturday morning at the hotel, as we lay in bed with our coffee too hot to drink, I snuggled into MrH’s side “Did you enjoy last night Sir? I asked. “I did very much Sweetgirl,” he replied. “Did you?” “Yes Sir.” I smiled. “Is there anything you didn’t like or wouldn’t want to do …
Fear
I shared a post a few weeks ago about squirting orgasms in “Overcoming Embarrassment” and I thought I needed to write a follow up. While I spoke in this earlier post about being embarrassed that I had wet the bed. While I have experienced these orgasms through masturbation I haven’t during play with MrH. This has prompted me to wonder… Why? I believe it’s because I’m ashamed and embarrassed. I believe I hold back frightened that MrH would be disgusted if he were covered or touched …
What are you waiting for? An invitation?
I’ve mentioned in other posts that right now I’m incredibly horny. This new level of submission (see take me own me use me) the realisation of this change as well as the reinstatement of the rules has thrown my body into a highly sensitive state. I have to ask if I want to use my syns. Each time I ask it reminds me of my submission. Each time he answers I get a thrill and my arousal increases. Add to this the new, stricter rule …
Home again.
We’re home from a wonderful stay in our favourite hotel, and as always when we pulled off the motorway there was that moment of “back to reality” sadness. We’ve been productive today though, washing the motorbikes, cleaning their chains and lubing them back up. They are both clean and sparking ready for the week ahead. But, my followers I know this is not what you’re interested in. Oh no – you want the juicy details of our debaucherous night….. We arrived and headed for the …
Instructions
MrH sent me a brief email with instructions for today: Hello sweetgirl. 1. This weekend before play starts you will be inspected. You will ensure you are smooth shaven and clean. Your hair in a plait. 2. There will be some.photos taken (possibly videos) so make sure you pack accordingly(body stockings. Suspenders and such like). If there are particular photos you would like let me know. 3. Ensure all equipment is charged/batteries available. 4. For our evening meal you will need a dress or skirt. …