Exploring Kink as a Monogamous Married Couple
Or something similar….. I ordered some shoes. I didn’t ask permission. I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I usually do. The only exception is if I’ve ordered things for work and then we haven’t paid for them or we’re getting the money back. I’ve been looking for some shoes for work for about 6 weeks now. I needed some flat but not really flat shoes. That might not seem to make sense but honestly it does! Some flat shoes have really thin soles and they …
I have spoken about how over the last few months/year masturbation has become difficult for me. The desire to do so has waned and so my orgasms fell into the domain of Mr H. Not because he commanded it, rather my body didn’t respond when I did try to masturbate and so eventually I just stopped even trying. Orgasms for Mr H Initially I could get round this by filming it and sending the video to Mr H. In my mind he would enjoy getting …
Normally I wouldn’t use the phrase “must” or “should” in relation to BDSM. Normally I would say do what works for you. But, in this one thing I am going to. In my opinion you cannot and should not be in any form of BDSM relationship without Trust. Whether it’s Bondage, Discipline, Dominance and submission, Sadism or Masochism, every aspect requires Trust. The Basics In the beginning, I believed M rH and I Trusted each other. I opened the door to D/s and that Trust …
There’s a line in the movie The Ugly Truth, Gerard Butler’s character ‘Mike‘ is telling Katherine Heigl’s character ‘Abbey’ the rules a woman should follow to get a guy interested in her and he says “a fake laugh is like a fake orgasm” “A fake orgasm is good?” Abbey asks. He says, “A fake orgasm is better than no orgasm.” “A fake orgasm is no orgasm,” she replies. Mikes response is, “Only to you. You’re not the only one in the room you know. Don’t …
Spanking was one of the first things I put onto my “Hell Yes” list when we began exploring BDSM. I didn’t do a whole lot of research, naively thinking I had a good understanding of the subject! Oh how little I knew!!!! Thankfully Mr H did do research. Unbeknownst to me, a lot of research. He found websites and forums, and brought them to my attention. In his post A New Dom’s Tale he talks about the first 6 months and his experience and his …
Our son went out last night.  Mr H was in the bath when he made the announcement, so we had no plans.  Thursday night we had our Wednesday cane session, as it was postponed, but my first thought as he left was “I wonder if Mr H would get the squealer out.” The squealer was a gift from HisLordship, a hand made leather strap in a wooden handle. We don’t use it often as it makes quite a nice (loud) sound on impact and just like …
I did it. The whole alphabet. I couldn’t have done it if I hadn’t spent the weekends preparing a number of posts in advance. It was an interesting challenge but not one I will do again. I prefer writing about things as they happen to me, as I think about them, or when something inspires me. It is my “journal” after all. Here are links to each post.
Earlier this month I wrote about my concerns that I couldn’t orgasm through masturbation any more following the introduction of D/s to our relationship. What I didn’t say in my broken fingers post, was that part of my concern was that perhaps my back issue has caused it. The loss of feeling I experienced when I was recently admitted to hospital, the fact that the nerves are not happy at the moment, I worried that my clitoral nerves had become damaged, that maybe they would …
Mr H will tell you he doesn’t find being in charge that different. He says he’s always had the final say or our house would be like a zoo. And he’s right. I’m a sucker for animals. We have 2 cats. We had a beautiful loving faithful dog. He passed 4 years ago and we still miss him. But without Mr H putting his foot down we would have another dog in the house by now. Mr H has an affinity with dogs, well all animals …
This is the word I use to caution Mr H. It tells him that I am nearing the limit of my tolerance, that I need him to take things slower, pause, or check in with me. This word doesn’t stop play.  This word prompts him to assess my body language, to verbally check in. I use this word when we play with the cane if the pain is getting too much, and he will rub my bottom for a few moments before checking I am happy to …