truth

The Ugly Truth

Everybody lies. There it is, plain and simple. I doubt there is a person alive who has NEVER told a lie, because I believe truth is in the eye of the beholder. I am certainly no saint when it comes to telling porkies, I told my boys Santa was real, and that they had the …

sex

Sex and BDSM

When our relationship first came to include BDSM, I imagined every single possible moment would be filled with sex. I wouldn’t be able to move without Mr H thrusting a hard cock into me and telling me what how he was proud of me, and how he loved I was always ready for him. Of …

Reclaim my arse

We spent the day in the local a&e and although they gave me some more pain medication we did not achieve our goal; forward movement in a treatment plan.  On the way home I asked Mr H to reclaim my arse. Knees up please. I did undergo all the usual tests which included my least …

Being Mindful

I practice being mindful often, and have done for years.  It is something that you are encouraged to do during counselling after a breakdown, to not focus on the past, and to be present in the moment.  It does take a lot of practice and I am not perfect at it, in fact most of …

thoughts

Friday Thoughts

It is Friday today, and I am laying in bed wondering what is going to happen next.  Yesterday’s appointment with the specialist was strange and it has created new challenges.  I am going to have to work hard to keep my thoughts positive and not get too down. Thoughts on Consultants We went to see …

Self Employment

Over the last few years I have toyed with the idea of self employment, mainly because I find my health so unpredictable that attending work regularly becomes difficult.  The problem being, when you are self employed you have to work or you do not earn. Less Pressure? But self employment could ultimately mean less pressure.  …

waiting

Waiting room

I am sitting in the waiting room watching the clock.  You are late.  Very late.  I have a book in my hand and I have tried reading it, but the words do not sink in.  They run around the page, skittering here and there, too fast for my eyes to follow.  I gave up trying …