No, I need a fuck. I want to feel Sir deep inside me. Sometimes the need becomes so acute my whole body aches for him. My pussy feels empty (which of course it is!) but you know what I mean- right? MrH has been poorly so He hasn’t felt like playing. He hasn’t been able to breathe so he hasn’t kissed me. When we don’t play for a while I have one of two reactions. Either I get super horny or I disconnect. Sometimes I get …
An everyday bra
Or is that a bra for everyday? @TheKnickerFairy on Twitter is a lovely lady who is an Anne Summers sales consultant. She sells via her twitter account and offers brilliant service and advice! I’ve bought some lovely things from her that Mr H has picked and I have to say I love him taking an interest in my underwear. He picks the set I wear each day and it’s one of the rules that I have to have a matching set on each day. There’s been …
Navigating rough seas
Maintaining a healthy mental state, is quite a challenge, at least it is for me. I take medication daily which works well to stabilise my mood. I’ve been medicated for depression and anxiety since 2005, essentially 18 months after my dad passed away. I had a full blown breakdown in 2005. I stopped working. I stopped functioning. I stopped doing pretty much everything. I spent 3 years getting better. I spent 3 years learning to deal with rough seas. It wasn’t all doom and gloom. In fact …
It’s only words
Last night Mr H and I played. It had been a while and I felt nervous and awkward. I wanted to play, really wanted to. But when play began I felt awkward and not in the moment. It began when Mr H put my night collar on. The TV was playing and as he started running his hands over me, the conversation on the TV invaded my mind. I shook my head to try and shake it off but it didn’t work. He asked me what …
Oh fudge!
Or something similar….. I ordered some shoes. I didn’t ask permission. I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I usually do. The only exception is if I’ve ordered things for work and then we haven’t paid for them or we’re getting the money back. I’ve been looking for some shoes for work for about 6 weeks now. I needed some flat but not really flat shoes. That might not seem to make sense but honestly it does! Some flat shoes have really thin soles and they …
Out of it
Things have been a little off lately. I’m so tired, a side effect of the amitriptyline, I come home from work, eat, and go to bed. MrH is suffering too. He just isn’t quite himself, and I know the situation must be hard for him. He’s worried about my back. He’s having to do so much extra. He drives me to work and then doubles back to go to work himself. He works through his lunch so he can leave early to come pick me up. …
Can I cum?
I have spoken about how over the last few months/year masturbation has become difficult for me. The desire to do so has waned and so my orgasms fell into the domain of Mr H. Not because he commanded it, rather my body didn’t respond when I did try to masturbate and so eventually I just stopped even trying. Orgasms for Mr H Initially I could get round this by filming it and sending the video to Mr H. In my mind he would enjoy getting …
Sexy Cardigan?
This morning I went downstairs to find my work clothes as I hadn’t put them away after washing them at the weekend. I put my cardigan over my new bra and panties set and when I walked into the kitchen where MrH was making drinks he paused for a moment and admired the view… The look on his face has made me smile all day… Who would have thought a cardigan could be so sexy??
How’s your pain?
I have written before about Pain… My pain. Probably far too much of my blog is about pain… although some of it is good pain. Good Pain that takes my bad pain away. Throughout today my pain has shifted from the current 6 to 7 then 8…. I phoned the GP and they have increased the new pain medication. When I got home I went in the bath, and then to bed. I lay down and cried. Partly because I’m home. Partly because I can relax. Mainly …
Tell Me About: Trust
Normally I wouldn’t use the phrase “must” or “should” in relation to BDSM. Normally I would say do what works for you. But, in this one thing I am going to. In my opinion you cannot and should not be in any form of BDSM relationship without Trust. Whether it’s Bondage, Discipline, Dominance and submission, Sadism or Masochism, every aspect requires Trust. The Basics In the beginning, I believed M rH and I Trusted each other. I opened the door to D/s and that Trust …